Kayt Ludi
Sometimes saying yes to drugs is the right answer. 
So, where the hell have I been (you would be entitled to ask)? 

1) In July 2018 the monsoon that tears through Arizona every year, literally ripped the roof off my condo in Phoenix. The roof was pealed back like the lid of a sardine can. The event  itself sounded like a freight train, then there were a few days of leaking and battling my irresponsible HOA, then there was the 8am Sunday morning collapse of a huge chunk of my bedroom ceiling - good times. That day my dad drove the three hours from where my parents live, helped me load up my dogs and crucial belongings, and I was out of there!

It took until the end of October for repairs on the condo to finish, then I sold it to my lovely neighbors (whose roof had also been destroyed) in November - deciding I never again wanted to own anything where the maintenance was at the mercy of an HOA I paid every month but which failed to actually maintain the property responsibly. 

Staying with my parents the entire time, I fell in love with the area they had moved to and decided to look locally for my future home. It took me until the following Spring (2019) to find something. But it was such a total wreck of a fixer upper I’m STILL not moved into it yet. So, my 5 small dogs and I are living in one small room at my parents’ house, and have been for about a year and a half. While I am obviously grateful not to be homeless, I am also on the verge of a nervous breakdown as well. 

2) On top of all that, shortly before the monsoon incident, I began to have more than normal trouble with my chronically bad back (osteoarthritis & a herniated disc pushing on my sciatic nerve). Suddenly it was much worse and my normal medication was nearly useless, then my hips and knees began to be problematic as well (I assumed it was just because I was out of alignment due to my back misbehaving). Over the ensuing year and a half I tried the chiropractor, physical therapy, vitamins, glucosamine chondroitin, turmeric, and anything else I found a vague recommendation for on the internet. Eventually, at my wits end, I broke down and went to the doctor. I hate going to the doctor (even though I currently have a wonderful one)! 

In December 2019 I found out that my Rheumatoid Factor was sky high, and was given the official diagnosis of RA. I still think it’s possible it’s actually PsA considering that I began to have psoriasis (for the first time in my life) at roughly the same time as the other symptoms, but it doesn’t really matter since the treatments are the same. 

I am currently attempting my first medication and am noticing some improvement. So far, the exhaustion, brain fog, and full body constant ache have lifted. The knees and hips are also less inflamed than they were. They’re not back to normal, and my back is still a catastrophe, but I’m fundamentally grateful to feel better in any way at all. 

Between the chaos of my living environment and the mutiny of my body, lots of stuff, including this site and my writing in general, fell by the wayside. But I feel a positive trend beginning now. I intend, and hope, to get back into the swing of things soon. 

My word for this year should probably be obvious: Regroup.

I have clearly dropped the ball of late. This site alone is proof of it. I thought I had a brilliant solution for keeping the posting here active by including any writing/reading/movie/story related assignment-produced content. Then I couldn't even keep up with that!

But despite the lateness of this post, I intend to make 2020 the year I get busy on here again.

You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life by Jen Sincero
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Listened to the audiobook version. While some of the advice was stuff that could be found in any other self help book, some of it was wholly original and exciting. And the author fully owned that not every word she was communicating could be called earth shattering. But the best reason to read this book as opposed to others is the style of the author. Jen Sincero writes like your best friend telling you the truth. She writes without pulling any punches, in a straightforward vernacular, but with a perceived underlying concern for your well-being and self improvement. It's basically impossible not to listen.

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Writing Fiction: A Guide to Narrative Craft Writing Fiction: A Guide to Narrative Craft by Janet Burroway
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I was assigned this book in my latest creative writing course. And, overall, it's a good read and a mostly helpful book. I admit some of it is redundant for anyone who has ever taken a previous course, or written anything of their own. But even when the subject being discussed was boring, the book often found a fresher take on it. We jumped around in the book, and didn't read the entire think in our 7.5 week course. I so liked what I read during the class that I went ahead and read the rest. Having done that, though, I can see why we skipped those parts. They didn't add much really. However, the parts we covered in class made up for that, I think, so I'm still giving this 4 stars.

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I'm something of a compartmentalizer.

I had a personal blog and a writing blog. I had a website to advertise my freelance writing and other marketable skills, and a separate site to talk about my fiction writing saga. I have a personal twitter and a writing twitter. I didn't want to "bother" people from one area of my life with stuff from another. Didn't want to bore personal friends with talk of writing, or posted poetry. Didn't want to offend fellow word-lovers with my politics, or bore them with monotonous check-ins to the same handful of places (I'd be depressingly easy to stalk if anyone were so inclined, lol).

But I'm done with that.

Maybe it's the New Year, or my new word. Maybe it's just my age showing - I am in my fuck-it-forties, after all. Maybe it was an article I read which said that having a website under a cutesy online pseudonym (like my qwertyKayt) is best if your 'brand' is talking about writing, while having a site under your own name is best for authors. Maybe it was all of that. Maybe it was none. If I knew myself better I wouldn't need to write to figure things out.

But I'm consolidating and streamlining things as much as possible. For now, twitter will remain divided because a)Twitter doesn't let me join two accounts, and b) my personal feed is SO crowded that even with Hoot Suite, lists, notifications about individual accounts, etc., I fear I'd miss some really good posts. I reserve the right to change my mind about this in the future.

If this blurring of lines offends, or bores, or bothers anyone I apologize ... ok, not really. This is my life, and ultimately the only person who has to be made happy by it is me. If some previously compartmentalized part of me really turns off some hitherto unexposed component of my tiny tribe, maybe we were never soulmates anyway.

But I hope that we are :-)


I don't know what rock I've been living under, but this concept of having a guiding word for the year is brand new to me. I only know about it because of a vlogger I watch regularly: She's in Her Apron. But the idea is SO up my alley.

I've never been a resolution-maker, but a word? I love words, obviously. I live for them, by them, and though them. To use one to define all my many intentions and goals for the year is one of those ideas where I'm mystified that I never thought of it!

My word for 2018 is: RELEASE

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