KaytLudi.com

Since I’ve written openly about my return to graduate school, I want to take a moment to share an update and acknowledge a change in direction. I’m not in graduate school anymore, for now. This wasn’t a decision I made lightly, and it wasn’t about a lack of interest or commitment. If anything, the desire to keep learning is still very much there. What changed were the logistics — specifically around student loans — and they ultimately made continuing right now impossible. The first issue was available financial aid. I knew I didn’t have enough to realistically cover the program, but updated figures — especially once interest was factored in — meant I wouldn’t even have half. I could have borrowed a small amount, but that leads to the second and much bigger problem: borrowing even a minimal amount would have reactivated my previously discharged student loan debt — over $130,000. That debt was discharged due to disability. To take out new federal student loans now, I would be require...

  With the nightmare that is Trump 2.0 I ask myself on a daily basis whether to stay or go.  Honestly, for reasons I've never known, I've just always assumed I would end my life in a different country than the one in which I was born.  Maybe it's a Sagittarius thing.  Maybe it was the faint shadow of fascism on the horizon I detected back in the Dubbya admin.  Maybe it was the fact my mother was in need of a caregiver for the last 25 years of her life and moving to a country where help could be better-afforded looked appealing.  Maybe it was the fact I fell in love with a European.  Maybe it was the fact I love teaching ESL.  Maybe it was all of that. Maybe it was none of it. I don't know. But considering leaving your country, even wanting to leave it, and feeling forced out are very different things.  As anyone who knows me will tell you, I have never (and will never) respond well to being told what to do (particularly by men).  I'm not...

I'm a month into my MA English Lit degree and to let you know how it's going ... I'm already shopping for a different program to start in Fall. Casting no aspersions on the program, the school, the professors, or the other students (all of which/whom I adore) this is very much not for me.  I feel a bit like I'm losing my mind - the stress, the workload, the lack of direction of statements like 'make a substantive post of what you found interesting' when I found it all too tedious to be of interest - is sucking the life out of me. I honestly can't figure out how I'm getting good grades so far - I have no idea what this crap is, what I'm supposed to do with it, or why I'm doing it.  I feel utterly lost, and that every word I write in these courses is BS. This is just too theoretical and I can see clearly that, for me, this is going to kill my love of reading in general and literature specifically. There is, after all, such a thing as picking someth...