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Course Correction, please


I'm a month into my MA English Lit degree and to let you know how it's going ... I'm already shopping for a different program to start in Fall. Casting no aspersions on the program, the school, the professors, or the other students (all of which/whom I adore) this is very much not for me. 

I feel a bit like I'm losing my mind - the stress, the workload, the lack of direction of statements like 'make a substantive post of what you found interesting' when I found it all too tedious to be of interest - is sucking the life out of me. I honestly can't figure out how I'm getting good grades so far - I have no idea what this crap is, what I'm supposed to do with it, or why I'm doing it. 

I feel utterly lost, and that every word I write in these courses is BS.

This is just too theoretical and I can see clearly that, for me, this is going to kill my love of reading in general and literature specifically. There is, after all, such a thing as picking something apart so much you destroy the magic, and what is the point of life, let alone literature, when there's no magic to it?

The two things I want to do in life, as far as I know, are write and teach - both of which can be accomplished with an MFA in some form of creative writing. Having found the program I would love to be part of, I now need to pick 25 pages of my best writing to submit, and cross my fingers I make it into one of the 20ish slots in the program.

Fingers crossed!!!

Now back to frying my brain reading Freud so I can apply archaic psychoanalysis principles to something I probably used to find beautiful.

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